Breathe.......

It's funny how a voluntary action such as breathing can become a focus for me but it's true....breathe Tonya, breathe...is a constant these days. With the overwhelming ever present thoughts of another deployment (1 year later from returning from deployment) and homeschooling, 4 kids and being in a big city (to which I haven't yet found my comfy place) I am at that place.......God are you with me? God can I do this, again? God I beg for your peace and strength to do this and keep my head above water!! I know Mary is the strength of a mother I can seek and the place I call my soft spot to fall. I just hope I remember it in times of need and in times of joy.

Deployment is never easy but after 3 in 5 years I a beginning to see I am a better person after each one. How? Why? because I seek Jesus to lead and Mary to teach me how to be that better mother and wife. I know God will not leave me alone while my husband devotes his year to his country. I am believing in the graces that will be bestowed upon us at a time of fear, sadness and anger.

I submit to the will of God as only He can lead me through a year, a year of learning. So as any good student I will continue to say Breathe Tonya, Breathe...........it will all be ok!